I just hope like hell I can do it for nine more weeks for you Lucy girl.
Never, have I had such emotion, such power behind a pregnancy. I can barely keep my own head above water…so how will I help you get here too?
I’m afraid you must hate me. I’m doing a terrible job with [...]
This is what it means to be held
“Listen to Me, you whom I have upheld since you were conceived and have carried since your birth. Even to your old age and gray hairs I am He and I am He who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you. I will sustain you and I will rescue you.” [...]
Meet Baby Lucy
Sweet baby,
As I lay on the ultrasound table watching you move and swirl I was impressed by your awareness and grace. While the sonographer poked, prodded, and measured I saw you…you, Lucy, I saw you. My eyes filled with instant tears of self-awareness.
In that moment, I realized, you Lucy, were real and true.
While the nightmare [...]
My baby.
Lila is 19 months old.
Just moments ago, as I sat heavy and weary from hours of reading about our present situation, I felt a tugging on my tank top.
I turned to Lila lifting my shirt, patting my belly which, at present, shows no signs of the 13 week child inside.
“Baby,” she says as she rocks [...]
Breathe in, Breath out
So I suppose the upside is, it’s October, not November.
You see this face?
Not only is it beautiful, but it’s mine. Well, my child’s that is. This is the face of hope, promise, and getting up in the morning.
Today I was told that this sweet face has a 1 in 42 chance of carrying a chromosomal abnormality.
Right [...]
and then…
they were a family of nine.
Redemption baby due Easter Sunday, 2009.
That makes me 9 weeks and 1 day pregnant today.
That leaves me approximately 30 weeks and 6 days to balance the weight of life and death. A heavy burden, no?
